But today I take courage to share a part of it. A part of my inner soul and the pain I have endured for the past year. 2011 was a moment of transition. I hope after relieving all these memories it will help me to focus and keep track on what I'm supposed to be doing.
These were a few of my random thoughts that tickled my mind..
It hurts so much. I am in deep pain. Thank you Lord. As weird as it seems I am thanking you for making me hurt this much.
-December 2011
If I am preserving myself too much for him why can't he do the same for me?
-December 2010
I know she's a christian. I hate her but as a sister in Christ I should be forgiving. In a way I know, she is a nice person. It's just that, she's just not that nice to me right now. So help me to forgive her.
-January 2011
I am upset. Brokenhearted.. I am not feeling any love from anyone anymore (except for little old terry who loves me so much)..
-January 2011
Today I am back to my usual waiting. Waiting for the right man to come. To put it simply, HE was never meant for me.
-February 2011
The Lord Jesus Christ is the only one that can fulfill the desires of my heart. He is my one true love.- February 2011
Lord, i am just so furious. I want to give him pain but I know it will never do me good. So Father take away my pain and bitterness and turn it into something beautiful.
February 2011
I do the natural. You do the supernatural.
-March 2011
The Lord has promised my breakthrough. The Lord has promised my abundant life.
-March 2011
These guys made me smile inspite of my breaking heart.
-July 2011
Today like other days I was alone. But today unlike other days I was not hoping to be with anyone. Having my headphones on is enough to make me smile.
-July 2011
If today is just a dream it would be the most wonderful of all the dreams.
-November 2011
Who says fandom can't cure heartaches? I beg to disagree.
-November 2011
God intended these things to happen. I may not like it but it's ALL worth it.
-December 2011
People will start to ask about my age and I will just laugh. It doesn't bother me anymore. I can be the best of what I am whatever age I may be.
-December 2011
and in conclusion to my blog archives here's one from 2012..
I had always lived up to my name. My name means God is gracious and my life has been a turn of events that leads me to give graciousness and forgiveness.
-January 2012
It feels weird reading simple sentences and putting them up together having a brief summary of my year. From deep s*** to unbelievably good high spirits. From smiling to laughing. It has been an awesome year. Nothing I expected since I never planned anything anyway (LOL). I am now (I assume I am) back to my old self and is willing to take steps to regain what I have lost.
I will not back down.
I am just taking back what was once taken away from me.
My smile.
